


Wasted

by AikoKanzaki



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Drugs, Drunk Sex, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Kissing, Drunken Shenanigans, M/M, Swearing, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-14 18:07:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29175390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AikoKanzaki/pseuds/AikoKanzaki
Summary: Mark is adorable when he's drunk. He's far more tactile and does aegyo willingly. But Doyoung notices that Mark does something with him that he doesn't do with others. If only he'd do it sober too.
Relationships: Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung/Mark Lee
Comments: 2
Kudos: 46





	Wasted

**Author's Note:**

> Quick note: I have no idea who roomed with who both at their dorm (before their relay cams) and at hotels during tours so if I get the roommates wrong just pretend they're correct for the sake of this fic xD you're welcome to inform and correct me in the comments though, but I won't change it in the fic.
> 
> Also, even I admit that the beginning is a little bit rough but bare with me and it gets good -- or at least I think so *cries*
> 
> Triggers and Content Warnings for: (Heavy) Drinking, Drunken Acts, Weed, Underage Drinking, Implied/Referenced Sex. I cover problems and injuries NCT have been through so I'm content warning that too just in case it's sensitive for you as a fan (e.g. the sasaeng problem, being overworked, Hyuck's injury, Doyoung's (possible?) chest problems, Jungwoo's hiatus, Taeyong's health etc.). If I missed any definitely let me know.
> 
> *
> 
> (#18 in my NaNoWriMo Challenge 2020) < None of them are related. You can read them in any order. They're all NCT centric.

The first time it happened was in Russia... Mark had had quite a bit to drink and was suddenly tactile with everyone. It was a surprise, but a welcome one at that. They all found it utterly adorable. However, that night Mark sneaked into Doyoung’s room after they all got back to the hotel. Jaehyun (Doyoung’s roommate) didn’t think of it as anything odd - he was smashed himself to be honest. But Doyoung thought it was strange.  _ Why is Mark coming into their room? Why not go to his own? _ But then he remembered just how much Mark had drunk. 

“What’s up?” asked Doyoung.  
Mark made his way to his bed and sat at the end of it.  “Remember when Leeteuk made me kiss you on the cheek?” He giggled. “Did you like it?”   
Doyoung cracked into amusement, “Yes Mark, I liked it. You were so cute.”   
“WERE?”    
“You  _ are _ so cute. Go to sleep, Mark.”    
“Can I stay here?”   
“Don’t you have your own room?” Mark looked at him with a pout. Doyoung sighed, “alright, come here. But you tell me in advance next time so we can room together and shove the beds together.”   
Mark giggled and got under the covers, leaving a little gap between them. 

Mark wasn’t there when Doyoung woke up.

*

But it happened again. 

Mark had been over at the Dreamies dorm to hang out and play games. He didn’t know til he got there that Hyuck had bribed Yuta into getting him alcohol.  Mark entered the dorm and saw a hyper than usual Hyuck - who had already had a drink. Jisung eyed his drink with great suspicion and took the smallest sips at a time. The rest of the group were halfway through their first drink when Mark turned up.   
“Mark!! You’re late, you have to do shots!”  
Mark was completely puzzled and tried to refuse, but Hyuck always got his way. Safe to say, Mark ended up out-drinking all of them. Jisung had taken the entire evening to drink his one glass - prefering to drink soda in between his sips. Jeno and Renjun stopped after two (which had more soda and ice than alcohol in them) claiming they wanted to stay as the responsible ones - even though they spent the night cuddling on the sofa. Jaemin gave up after half a glass; it wasn’t for him at all. And Hyuck… he was sent to bed in Renjun’s room after he fell down and couldn’t walk by himself to the bathroom - he'd had 3 straight drinks and shots. Mark ended up finishing the bottle. Whatever it was, it had '15% alc' written on it. If he left it there in the dorm, god knows Hyuck would find it and continue after he left.

Mark stumbled back to the 127 dorms. Luckily they lived next to each other and could move between the two buildings via a private in-building walkway rather than having to go outside where all the sasaengs camped.  _ Seriously someone should deal with them _ , he thought as he stumbled into the dorm. The lights were off. He stumbled his way through the hallway after eventually pulling his shoes off, leaving them askew in the doorway. It didn’t even register where he was going until he had entered the room. Doyoung’s room. Doyoung was asleep, all curled up around himself and his latest teddy bear. He looked cute. He wass cute. Mark shuffled forward quietly and poked Doyoung’s arm. Doyoung was a light sleeper so he woke up from the prod immediately.

“What?” he grumbled.   
“Hyung,” Mark whispered.   
Doyoung turned over to face Mark, “Mark? What’s wrong?” he sat up.   
“Nothing hyung… can I sleep with you?”  
“What?”  
“Can I join you? I want….” Mark bit his lip, “cuddles.”   
Doyoung huffed, out of adoration, “okay sure. But did you brush your teeth yet?” Mark shook his head. “Do that first… and water.”  
Mark nodded and shuffled quietly back out into the hallway. He managed to get to the bathroom without making noise, but he did drop the toothbrush AND toothpaste in the sink a few times, clinking against the sink. He got a glass of water in the kitchen, and finished a full glass before refilling and creeping back to Doyoung’s. Doyoung had curled back into himself in bed, back facing Mark. Mark smiled a little and climbed over Doyoung to get to the spot against the wall.   
“Aren’t you uncomfortable?” Doyoung mumbled but didn’t open his eyes. Mark puzzled a moment before it clicked… He’s still fully clothed. He sat up and removed his hoodie, socks and jeans before he shuffled back down and faced Doyoung. A moment of silence.    
“Hyung?”   
“Yes Markie?”   
“....can I hug you now?”  
Doyoung moved out of his curled position and put one arm under Mark’s neck and the other over his shoulder. Mark moved closer into Doyoung’s chest and put one hand under his own head, and the other lightly on Doyoung’s hip. He slowly shuffled his legs over to entangle them.    
“Goodnight hyung,” he whispered.   
“Goodnight Markie.”

Doyoung awoke the next day to find Mark was once again gone. But there was a sticky note on the wall:  _ Can you be the hyung I call when I’m drunk? Johnny would tease and Taeyong would get mad. _

Doyoung scoffed as he grabbed his phone:  _ Anytime Markie. You can call me anytime. Drunk or not. _

*

It was easy to slip alcohol into the younger member’s drinks at the SM Halloween Party of 2018. Mark had asked for a little: he had ended with a lot. Fortunately, no one snapped his picture by the time he was in full drunk mode. They managed to get him to the vans without looking too far gone; he could walk at least. Mark climbed into the van first, taking the furthest seat at the back. He watched as people got on, but when Taeyong went to sit next to him, he suddenly yelled “NO!” shocking everyone.   
“I want Doyoungie,” he pouted in aegyo. Taeyong wasn’t even mad. This was hilarious. Mark never acted like this, so he shrugged and swapped seats. It was dark, they kept the lights off in the van, street lights illuminating the inside of the van now and again. Mark took no time leaning his head on Doyoung’s shoulder, linking with his arm and grabbing onto his hand. Doyoung chuckled internally. Mark definitely was never like this. Mark played with Doyoung’s hand and fingers the entire ride home. Everyone climbed out when they got to their home, and made their way to their rooms.

Doyoung started undoing his costume when a knock came at the door. He opened it to Mark who was playing with his pant’s pockets.   
“Mark?”  
“Hyung!” he looked up smiling and pushed himself into the room.  
“What is it?” Doyoung closed the door and watched Mark stand in the middle of the room.   
“Don’t I look cute?”    
It took Doyoung a second to react, “...of course.”  
“How cute?” Mark placed his hands behind his back and puffed his chest out.    
“Very cute Mark."   
“Really?” he cocked his head to the side.   
“Yes Mark, really.”   
Mark smiled, “good,” he then turned his attention to items on Doyoung’s table. Doyoung took that as a cue to continue undoing his costume. Once he got the top part off, leaving him in a tank and the pants, Mark spoke again, “Nn, hyung?”   
“Yeah?”  
He stopped pursuing the items on the desk and turned back to Doyoung. “Would you kiss me?”  
“Huh?!” Doyoung was alarmed.  
“Well you said I’m cute so,” he walked over to where Doyoung stood, “doesn’t that mean you would kiss me?”  
“Mark, what are you saying? You’re drunk."  
“I am but, I want to know.. would you?”   
Doyoung thought it’s best to indulge the boy rather than make him a sad drunk, “yes Mark, I would kiss you because you’re cute.”   
Mark now stood in front of Doyoung, “really?”  
“Yes really,” Doyoung breathed out a laugh. But Mark’s facial expression was far from amused. He looked like he wanted to beg. Like he was at a loss.  
“Can I kiss you?”   
Doyoung barely heard the whisper leave Mark’s mouth. “...for real?”  
“Hyung, I want to kiss you.”  
Doyoung’s heart rippled. Mark waited a moment but Doyoung neither replied nor moved, so he slowly closed the gap between the two of them. When Mark was almost flat against him, Mark took another moment to look at both of Doyoung’s eyes. Doyoung’s eyes betrayed him and they flickered to Mark’s lips. Doyoung let out an unsteady breath. Doyoung felt Mark’s hands hold onto his wrists. Doyoung had time to look back into Mark’s eyes, then all he felt were lips on his. Mark’s eyes were closed, his hands holding his wrists firmly. Doyoung held still. It was just a peck but it felt like a soft time-absorbing one. Mark pulled back a little and looked straight into Doyoung’s eye, “Can I do it again?” he bit his lip.   
_ Cute _ Doyoung though. He doesn’t know who or what compelled him but he moved before Mark could kiss him first. Just as lightly as the first time, but Mark reacted quickly and kissed back. Mark moved a hand to Doyoung’s shoulder as the kisses turned open mouthed, teeth occasionally clashing.  He gripped Doyoung’s shoulder tightly as they pulled apart.   
“I think you should go to bed Mark,” Doyouing whispered, breathless.  
“Can I sleep here?”  
Doyoung smiled, “of course,” he knew Mark wouldn’t take ‘no’ anyway.

*

Doyoung should’ve seen it coming the next time. They were in America promoting Regular and had the night off, so they all decided to gather in one of their rooms, bottles of alcohol in hand.   
“We can’t go overboard, we have a schedule tomorrow,” Taeyong warned.   
“Yeah but not until tomorrow afternoon!”  
“ _You_ should definitely not be drinking Hyuck."   
“Come on, just a little! ...  Hyung, I promise I’ll behave.”   
“When have you ever behaved?”   
“I behave!”  
“Occasionally. But you sure ain’t like Mark over here,” Jaehyun threw his arm behind Mark who sat next to him, “he gets all cuddly but nothing wild.”  
Doyoung snorted as he poured the drinks. If only they knew the  _ real _ drunk Mark. Doyoung frowned at his own thought. Why was Mark like when he got drunk? And why was it only with him? Was it only with him?! A small part of him sure hoped so…

They were a few drinks in when Doyoung's phone buzzed:

_ Looking good ;) _

_ What do you want Mark? _

_ No Markie?! =( _

_ Markie, what do you want? _

_ Better ^_^ nothin. You look good… _

_ Is that all? _

_ No… _

_ What? _

_ I really wanna kith you. _

_ Well you can’t. _

_ But we could ='( _

_ No Mark, we couldn’t. _

_ MARKIE >.< _

_ No Markie. _

_ But whhyyyyyy??? _

_ Why are you doing this? _

“Hey Doie?” spoke Jungwoo.   
Doyoung shot his head up from his phone, “Yeah?”   
“You seem out of it,” Jungwoo looked worried.  
“Sorry, I’m just too tired to enjoy the alcohol tonight.”   
“You sure?”   
“Yeah,” Doyoung smiled. He felt the phone buzz in his pocket again:

_ I could wake you up with kith right now! _

_ Not now Mark. _

_ Whhhyyyyy??? _

_ Answer my question first. _

_ …What question??? _

Doyoung huffed, turned his phone on silent and stuck it in his pocket. Mark’s shoulders slouched down from the other side of the room.

“Alright, out! You all drank enough and I want my cuddle time, OUT!”  Hyuck lazily threw his door open and lent on it.  
“Says you. You can hardly walk.” spoke Jaehyun.  
“But I can still talk! That’s all that matters.”   
“Shame your legs go rather than your mouth,” jabbed Yuta.  
“Hey!” Hyuck pouted, tears welling in his eyes.  
“No! No! No! I didn’t mean it!” Yuta hugged.  
“Really?”   
“Really Hyuckie, you’re just too drunk to understand.”   
“I’ma go bed,” Hyuck shuffled back to his bed and plopped onto it.  
“Don’t worry, I’ll sort him out. See you guys tomorrow,” Johnny waved from inside the door as they left. The rest of them headed to the elevator.

“Night guys,” waved Mark as he headed the other way.  
“Where are you going?” asked Jungwoo.   
“I’m taking the stairs.”   
“We’re three floors up.”   
“I can still walk, I’m not Hyuck,” scoffed Mark as he turned into the stairwell. Doyoung watched Mark disappear from view. He stood with everyone else until the elevator pinged.  
“You not getting in?” wondered Taeil.   
“Nah, I’ll follow Mark. Someone has to.” Doyoung mentally kicked himself as he walked away from them and towards the stairwell. Why was he following Mark? Why was he doing this? Did he even like Mark that way? He was following Mark because he was drunk. That was the only reason why… right?   
“I knew it.”   
Doyoung jumped as soon as he entered the stairwell due to the voice that came right beside him.   
“You didn’t go upstairs?”  
“I knew you’d follow me, hyung,” Mark hugged one of Doyoung’s arms tightly.  
“How exactly did you know?”   
“I just did,” Mark smiled up.  
“What if it had been someone else?”  
“Then it would’ve been a fun scare! But it wasn’t them...” his voice got quiet, “it was you.”  
“Mark I-”  
“Markie.”   
“Right… Markie.”   
“Hyung?”  
“Yes?”

Instead of answering, Mark smiled and unlinked his arms. He dropped one hand to Doyoung’s, and lightly held three fingers.  
“Let’s go.” Mark took the lead going up the stairs, tugging Doyoung by his fingers to follow.

Mark turned around when Doyoung was one step short of reaching the first flight of stairs.  
“Hyung?”   
“Yes?”   
Mark lent down and quickly pecked his lips.  
“Markie?"   
“Shh,” Mark put a finger to his own lips. He turned back around and tugged Doyoung again. One more flight of stairs. Mark turned around again.   
“Hyung?”   
“Yes?”   
Mark wrapped his free arm around the Doyoung’s neck. Mark gave a small smile before leaning in and placing a soft, firm kiss on Doyoung’s lips. Doyoung’s hands instinctively constricted around Mark’s. Doyoung felt his balance change and placed a hand on Mark’s hip to keep himself steady. Mark pulled back to look Doyoung in the eyes.  
“Hyung?”   
Doyoung looked between Mark’s eyes and then his lips and back up, “yes?”  
Mark breathlessly laughed through his nose. He leaned back in, pressing his lips harder this time. And Doyoung responded. He tilted his head to the side a little to gain better access. Doyoung’s hand clenched more. Mark responded by lacing their fingers together and pulling him closer. Doyoung tightened his grip on Mark’s hip. Doyoung felt Mark’s arm move from around his shoulder to the back of his head. He was playing with the strands at his neck lightly.  
They broke apart for breath. Doyoung looked at Mark’s eyes trying to see what was inside.  _ What is he thinking _ ? But Mark still looked as light and smiley as ever.  
Mark tugged their hands again, leading them up another flight. The last flight. Doyoung felt like time had slowed down. His heart raced more with every step they went up. Mark stopped and turned at the top again. He gave another tug and Doyoung joined him at the top, between Mark and the wall. The air was chill. Sounds were completely void. It was just them two. Doyoung felt like his racing heart could be heard even by Mark. But he kept his face composed.  
“Hyung?”   
“Yes?”  
Mark placed a hand upon his shoulder and pushed him gently. Doyoung’s back landed against the wall lightly.   
“Hyung?”   
Doyoung flicked between his eyes, “Yes?”   
Mark’s lips were back upon his. Stronger than they had been previously. It didn’t take long for the kiss to deepen. Mark slipped his tongue effortlessly inside Doyoung’s mouth and gripped the hair at the bottom of Doyoung’s nape. Doyoung’s hand was back on Mark’s hip, playing with the hem. Mark was the first to release from their intertwined hands. Doyoung gripped onto Mark’s shoulder as Mark slipped his hand under his hem and trailed lightly at the waist. A small whimper escaped Doyoung’s mouth. Doyoung, shocked at his own mouth, pulled back from Mark’s lips instantly. Doyoung felt his face flush red with embarrassment.   
“Hyung?” Mark looked at Doyoung with worry in his eyes. But Doyoung couldn’t respond. He was completely mortified inside. Why did he let _that_ noise escape?  _ Disgusting _ .  
“Hyung?” Mark cupped Doyoung’s chin and pulled it up so Doyoung would look at him properly. Doyoung bit lip. Mark stroked his hip slowly trying to reassure him. But Doyoung’s brain was taking it another way. It was causing goosebumps. Raising his temperature even more. Mark felt Doyoung’s stomach tighten at the contact.  “Doie?” his eyebrows were now scrunching.  
_ No that’s not what upset me, _ thought Doyoung. Doyoung released his bottom lip and gripped Mark’s shoulder a little tighter.  _ Fuck it. _   
“Markie...”   
“Doie, are you-” Mark couldn’t finish his sentence. Doyoung’s lips were back upon his. He happily responded with his own hard kiss. Doyoung flew both arms around Mark’s neck, and used his fingers to dig and grip. A moan escaped Mark. Mark used the hand on his waist to push him hard against the wall. Doyoung felt a hand slowly move up his waist, over his rib cage, and began slowly rubbing his nipple. Doyoung didn’t even register the moan that left him this time, too focused on the way Mark rubbed, as well as how  _ good  _ it felt.   
“ _ Hyung _ ,” Mark’s voice was barely a whisper as he left Doyoung’s lips. He moved to Doyoung’s jaw. He kissed alongside his jawline up to his ear. “ _ Hyung, _ ” the words entered Doyoung’s ear and filled up his entire mind. Doyoung gripped Mark’s hair tightly again as Mark bit his earlobe rather sharply.   
“ _ Hn” _ _  
_ _ “Hyung,”  _ Mark moved to his neck; kissing, sucking, licking as he moved down. Doyoung laid his head back against the wall to allow better access. Doyoung felt nipping between his collarbone and sternum. Mark brought his other hand under and up Doyoung’s shirt, pulling it up at the same time. Doyoung’s skin goosebumped at the cold air contact. He barely had time to react as Mark placed his lips on his nipple. Kissing softly at first, but soon the intensity increased and built into a hard suck.   
“ _ Hn Markie, _ ” he was breathless. He felt himself getting hard.  
“ _ Hyung" _ _  
_ _ “Hn _ ” he felt Mark’s tongue swirling around his nipple.  Mark bit slightly, “ _ Mark- _ ” a high whine left his lips.

Both were surprised at the same time and immediately stopped what they were doing. They stared at each other bewildered.   
“Hyu-”  
“-We should stop,” Doyoung let go of his grip around Mark and pulled his shirt down. Mark brought his arms back to his side immedaitely.  "It’s late.” Doyoung grabbed Mark’s wrist and led them out of the stairwell. He took Mark to his own door. “Goodnight Mark.” he let go of his wrist.   
“Hyung...”  
Doyoung looked to see Mark’s sad face. Doyoung could only give a small smile, “we’re drunk. Go to sleep.” he whispered and entered his own room.

“Took your time. You okay?” Jaehyun spoke from his bed.   
“Yeah, me and Mark decided to have a chat in the stairwell,” Doyoung went straight to the bathroom before Jaehyun could see him. He turned the lights on and immediately took his shirt off. There were some faint red marks but nothing the dim light in the bedroom would highlight.   
“Drunk talks tend to happen in such places.”   
“Yeah…” Doyoung grabbed his toothbrush and brushed his teeth, settling in for the night.

_ Hyung, I’m sorry if yesterday was too much. It won’t happen again. _

Was the text he woke up to. But he wanted more. That’s what scared him.

*

Doyoung was really beginning to wonder what the fuck was going on by the time their first ever Japan tour came around. They were still sorting out the kinks in their performance since Seoul and were still trying to work around Hyuck and the injury that kept him out of the tour. After their second show in Sapporo, the staff had brought them to a nice restaurant. There would be about two weeks until their next stop so they decided to have a mid-way tour celebration. Mark had sat in the corner all night quietly sipping his drink. The members were worried but understood how he was feeling. When they got into the cars to head back, Mark placed himself next to Doyoung who was sitting next to the window. Doyoung felt Mark’s hand curl around his. He looked over to see Mark on his phone, paying no mind. Doyoung went back to looking out the window, into the dark black landscape of Sapporo. 

Doyoung felt his phone vibrate as they took the elevator to their rooms:

_ Come to my room. _

Mark had a room to himself now that there were an uneven number of people when they included the staff. Doyoung went to his shared room with Jungwoo and got changed.  
“Where are you going?” Jungwoo asked as he watched Doyoung go towards the door in his pajamas.   
“I’m going to talk to Mark. I’m a little… worried.”   
“Yeah he’s been really quiet. He must really miss having Donghyuck around.”   
“Yeah. I’ll just make sure he’s okay, okay?”   
“No problem. Goodnight!”  
Doyoung laughed and left the room.

Mark was in his pajamas and glasses when he opened the door to Doyoung’s knocking. He moved to the side to let him in. Doyoung sat on the edge of the bed and looked at Mark who took the chair.  
“Are you okay?”  
“Yeah…”  
“You don’t sound it….”   
Mark kept looking down at the floor.  
“I know you miss Haechan but-”  
“I miss him a lot… He doesn’t talk to me.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“I mean… yeah, he talks to me. But it’s about silly stuff, or in the Dream group chat, or memes but...”  
“But?”  
“I heard he’s talking to Taeil hyung about…. about the serious stuff.” Mark sighed, “Why won’t he talk to me about the serious stuff? He gets injured and suddenly he’s relying on Taeil hyung all the time instead of me… his best friend...”  
“I’m sure he doesn’t mean to hurt you Mark. I think he just wants to keep things light and happy between you two for his own sake.”  
“He always tries to hide when he’s not happy. He always lies like this. Even has fans fooled that he’s okay.”  
“Have you told him?”  
“I tried but he just called me stupid and told me he’s fine and-”  
“Then he’s fine.”  
Mark finally looked at him, “but he’s not. He’s lying.”  
“Mark,” Doyoung stood up and placed his hands on his shoulders, “he doesn’t want you worrying. He wants you there as his positive support. Maybe he’s worried that if he tells you all the bad that he won’t be able to stay strong.”  
“He doesn’t need to be strong around me.”  
“He needs you to be the positive side of his life right now, so he can be strong enough to face the difficult stuff. You are the positive force keeping him strong.”  
“But...”  
“Try to see his side. If you’re going through something bad, don’t you want at least one friend that keeps everything light and happy so you can just forget a while, breathe a while, relax?” Mark nodded. “There are enough hyungs, staff, and family worrying about him. Let him have you as his happy comfort zone, okay?”  
Mark bit his lip and looked up at Doyoung, “I miss him.”  
“I know you do. But he’ll come back. Soon enough,” Doyoung smiled.  
Mark stood up to face him, “...I miss you.” he whispered.  
“I’m right here. You can see me whenever-”  
“Not like that… I miss you.”  
Doyoung felt his breath hitch as Mark held his waist lightly.  
“Mark, you’re drunk.”  
“So?”  
“Again.” _As usual_ Doyoung thought but didn’t say it.  
“Am I not allowed to be?”  
“You’re sad and hurting over Donghyuck.”  
“Then make me feel better...”   
Doyoung couldn’t reply to that. Mark leaned in and kissed his lips so softly. A barely there kiss. He looked into Doyoung’s eye. Doyoung was frozen in place. _Again_ he thought.  
“Make me forget that I’m worried…” He kissed Doyoung again; a little longer. “Be my happy comfort.” Another kiss, a little harder, longer this time. “Just for a short while.”  
Doyoung instinctively opened his mouth and let Mark’s tongue enter. “Hyung...”  
“Mark... ”  
“Please just for now...” his voice was barely above a whisper. Mark stayed where he was, just a few inches away from Doyoung’s face, staring up at him, eyes never leaving the elder’s. Doyoung saw the pleading in Mark’s eyes. How could he reject that?  
Doyoung moved his hands to cup the younger’s neck and jaw, “Markie,” he breathed out and leaned in. It was his turn to enter his own tongue into Mark’s hot mouth. Mark gripped onto his hips tightly as Doyoung explored his mouth. Doyoung gripped Mark’s hair as the kiss deepened. He wanted to get deeper. He wanted more. Mark responded with his own fever; one hand moved his butt as the other stroked his waist roughly. Moans drifted out of their mouths.  
They didn’t realise that their actions were moving Doyoung back until their legs hit the bed. Mark broke the kiss and looked at Doyoung. He smirked as he put both hands on his shoulders and pushed Doyoung down to sit on the bed’s edge. Doyoung looked up as Mark straddled his lap. Doyoung’s hands went instinctively to Mark’s hips. _To keep him balanced,_ he deluded himself. Mark worked on Doyoung’s neck just like last time. Kissing slowly down his neck. Occasionally licking and biting lightly. Doyoung placed a hand behind Mark’s head and pulled him closer towards him. Mark responded by biting and sucking along his collarbone. Doyoung threw his head to the side to give Mark more to play with. He caught himself in the mirror directly across from the bed. Mark’s body was covering him completely in the reflection. All he could see were his legs under Mark’s, his head against Mark’s shoulder, a hand in his hair, and his other on his loosely holding his waist. The sight made him want to do more. Prove he could look less pathetic. So he began to grope Mark’s thigh.  
“ _Hyung,_ ” a moan. So he continued slowly massaging and groping his thigh. He could feel Mark’s hips begin to move. Slowly grinding and rotating. Moans slipped out of both of them.  
“ _Markie,_ ” he fluttered his eyes shut as the kisses moved back up his neck.  
“ _Hyung… hyung..._ ” each time Doyoung squeezed his thigh tightly.  
A deep, slow “ _hyung”_ whispered into his ear when Mark got back to his starting position. Doyoung stopped everything and looked at Mark. He smirked at Mark’s pleading eyes and slightly open mouth. It was watery and shiny. Doyoung took the chance to drag himself up the bed and got on his knees. He held out a hand to Mark who gladly took it. They knelt in front of each other for a moment. They were so close. Then Doyoung took his chance. He used one leg to wrap around Mark’s waist and pushed him to the side. Their positions changed. Doyoung had his hands on either side of Mark’s head while Mark looked up, surprised from suddenly being switched and pushed onto the mattress.  
“Hyung?” Mark held onto Doyoung’s waist and pulled him closer. Doyoung dropped onto his forearms and kissed Mark deeply. He wasn’t going to let Mark control this time. It was his turn. He took off Mark’s glasses and put them on the bedside table.  
“Hyu-”  
“Shh. Not another word,” he whispered. He felt Mark’s body shiver from the whisper. He couldn’t help but smile in pride. He worked on and down Mark’s neck. Mark was more vocal than Doyoung. Small whimpering and whining at every nip and bite. He worked on unbuttoning Mark's pajamas top and worked from his collarbone and to his chest. Mark’s back arched as Doyoung trailed down and hooked his mouth onto a nipple. Mark tried to put his hand in Doyoung’s hair but Doyoung gripped his wrist and held it down on the bed. Keeping him down firmly.  
“ _Ah!_ ” Doyoung nipped his nipple. “ _hn… hyung…”_ he whined. Doyoung felt his chest rising and falling hard and fast the longer he played with his nipples, switching between them.  
“ _Doie..._ ” Mark breathed out. Doyoung stopped to look up at Mark who was red, flushed in the face and looking down at Doyoung. Doyoung moved back up to meet Mark’s eyes. “What’s wrong _?_ ” he smirked.  
“P-please…”  
“Please what?” Doyoung cocked his head to the side. He moved his hand. “Oh… what do we have here?” he felt Mark’s erection slightly under his hand.   
“Doie...”  
“Yes?”  
“....fuck me.”  
Doyoung’s brain short circuited, his eyes widened, “Mark I…”  
“Do it…”  
“Mark, you can’t just-”  
Mark sat up on his forearms and came close to Doyoung’s face, “Doyoung…” Mark watched Doyoung close his lips and gulp hard.  
“Say it.” Doyoung’s voice was flat, quiet, unemotional. He was serious. He needed Mark to be too.  
“Fuck me, hyung.”  
And who was Doyoung to deny someone who spoke so surely, unwavering?

Doyoung woke up to a banging at the door. He sat up suddenly and looked around the room. It certainly wasn’t his room. He noticed two pairs of pajamas folded nicely on the desk. He looked down and saw his chest bare, covers wrapped around his lower half.  _ Bang bang bang _ . Doyoung got out of bed and quickly threw his pajamas on. Luckily his top was still buttoned up, but he barely got his bottoms around his hips when he opened the door.   
“Yes?”   
“Wow nice hair hyung!” giggled Jungwoo. Doyoung quickly ran his hands through his hair. “We’re leaving in an hour. Mark said you fell asleep here while you were talking.”  
_ Oh there was barely any talking _ Doyoung remembered.   
“He seems happier today, so I guess the talking worked. Isn’t that great Doie!” Jungwoo smiled. It was too bright for Doyoung’s liking right now. He followed Jungwoo back to their room. “Where is Mark?”   
“Oh apparently he went to Johnny’s room this morning. They got the early breakfast service together. Y’know how Johnny is the earliest riser of us all.”   
Something tugged in Doyoung’s heart. Did Mark not want to stay in the same room as him? Was Mark… ashamed to wake up next to him this morning?  
“Let me get a shower and then we can leave for breakfast."   
“Sure thing Doie. I’ll be on my bed waiting.”

Doyoung closed the door to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. He felt disgusted.

*

“Mark, what is going on?” Doyoung hissed under his breath as Mark came out of Johnny’s family's bathroom.  
“What is going on what?”   
Doyoung guessed the marihuana was starting to kick in.  
“You know Mark.”  D oyoung wanted answers. He was so confused about what they are, what they’re doing.  
“What… it’s just fun.”   
“Just fun?”   
“Yeah, nothing deep.”   
“If it’s nothing deep then...” Doyoung fell silent.  
“Then what?”   
“If you just want some harmless fun then we should be able to do it sober too, right?”   
Mark scoffed, “That would defeat the purpose.”   
“The purpose of what?”   
“Of having fun. We have fun when we drink. We have fun when we smoke-”   
“You saying we can’t have fun sober too?”   
Mark fell silent. He couldn’t answer.   
“Come on Mark, just one time. Prove it. Be sober next time.”  
“Hey, are you guys changed yet?” Johnny yelled from his room.  
“Can’t you just enjoy it Doie? It’s nothing deep,” Mark walked back to Johnny’s room.  
Doyoung stood in the hallway. “Just fun it is,” he whispered to himself and joined the other two in the bedroom.  
“Let’s film our clip for NCT Daily,” suggested Johnny.

It was a few hours later and they had definitely made a dent in the cans of beers they’d bought, and they were definitely more horizontal thanks to the weed. Johnny sat against his headboard as Doyoung led down the opposite side. Mark was using Johnny’s thigh as a pillow, focused on his phone.  
“I think it worked,” giggled Doyoung, refering to the drugs.  
“That it sure did,” spoke Johnny.  
“You don’t think everyone’ll know?”  
“I think everyone who watches the Daily video will know.”   
“Oh yeah for real,” spoke up Mark.  
“But we won’t be in trouble right?” asked Doyoung quietly.  
Johnny laughed, “nah, we’ll be fine.”   
Mark scoffed, “why are you always so cautious?”   
“Nothing wrong in that,” pouted Doyoung.  
“I agree. Nothing wrong with being careful. But we’re cool, don’t worry. It’s legal in homes.”   
“Ok,” his voice was small.   
Johnny scoffed, “cute.”   
“Me? I know” Mark was still glued to his phone.  
“HA! Not you, you little gremlin!” Johnny laughed. Doyoung cracked into a smile.  
“I am not a gremlin! Take that back!” Mark threw his phone down and sat on Johnny’s legs.  
“Why would I take back something that’s true?!”   
“I am not little!”   
“Compared to me you are!”  
“Doie!” Doyoung’s heart pulled. “Tell him I’m not small!”   
Doyoung shrugged, “who am I to judge.”   
Mark crossed his arms, “y’all mean.”   
“Only because you bite so hard at the bait,” giggled Johnny.  
“Now ’am hurt...” Mark was pulling the aegyo card, “say sowwie.”   
“Fiiinee, I’m sorry. You’re not little.”   
“Good!” Mark threw his hands in the air, “now kiss me as a proper sorry.”  
Doyoung felt time stop. He was asking Johnny for a kiss now?!  
Johnny laughed, “you see how horny and clingy he gets when he drinks _and_ smokes?” he was looking at Doyoung, “you think he’d learn to handle it by now.”   
“I’m waiting!”   
“Do you mind?” Johnny asked Doyoung, “he’s not gunna shut up unless. And I don’t want an upset high drunk to deal with tonight.”   
“I heard that!”  
“No. It’s Mark after all. He’s always like this,” Doyoung flicked his hand towards them to show he didn’t care. But in fact he did. A lot.  
“Okay Markie. Shut the fuck up," Johnny gave Mark a quick peck on the lips, “better?”   
“Much!” Mark got off Johnny and went back to his phone.  
“Seriously. The attitude,” a half laugh left Johnny’s mouth.  
“I agree. He really should know better at this point.”  
“I know he’s not as open as Haechan or Jungwoo. They just come after us whenever but...”  
“I guess drinking helps him bring out his real self?” Doyoung wondered both to himself and to Johnny.  
“Seems that way. But we still gotta keep tabs on how much he drinks.”  
“Agreed.”   
“I can hear you,” muttered Mark.  
“We know,” Johnny poked his side, making Mark yelp. Johnny laughed. Doyoung watched.

“Alright, night guys,” Johnny shut his bedroom door as they walked to the guest room. Mark jumped on the bed as soon as they got in.   
“Come on hyung! Hurry and join me!” he spread his hands out wide. Doyoung scoffed and walked over to the bed. He sat down on the edge.  “Come on hyung, get in bed,” Mark shuffled into the duvet. He cuddled into the pillow and looked up at him, “are you not tired?”   
Doyoung looked down at him, “Yeah, I am.”   
“Then get in and let’s cuddle,” he patted the spot next to him. Doyoung waited a moment before leaning down and kissing Mark’s lips.  
“What was that for?” Mark smiled up.  
“Well Johnny got one, why not me?”   
Mark giggled, “good point,” Mark clasped a hand around Doyoung’s neck and pulled him back in. As the kiss deepened, Doyoung leaned in so Mark laid back down. Doyoung swung his leg over Mark in a straddle.   
“Why didn’t you kiss Johnny like this?” Doyoung whispered when they broke apart.  
“Well Johnny doesn’t kiss like you do.”   
“I’m quite sure he’d love to hear you say that.”   
“He would kill me.”  
“Yes he would,” Doyoung stole another kiss, “should I tell him?”   
“Nooooo,” Mark whined.   
Doyoung smiled, “cute.”   
“No, you are,” Mark kissed him one more time.  
Doyoung joined Mark under the duvet. Mark placed his head on Doyoung’s chest and Doyoung wrapped an arm over his shoulders. Mark pecked his cheek. And then again. And then he moved back to his lips.   
“Mark...”  
“Yeah?”   
“We should sleep.”   
“Just one more.”   
“Okay.”  Doyoung stroked his cheek as they kissed slowly. Mark looked up when the kiss finished.   
“Just one more…” whispered Mark and kissed him.   
“Goodnight Markie”   
“Goodnight Doie.”

*

It hit him hard. It hit them all hard. Jungwoo would be taking time off for his health, meaning he wouldn’t be on the second Japan Tour. On top of that, Mark and Taeyong were rehearsing and performing for their SuperM tour, which would be interchangeable with the 127 tour. It was tiring, and everyone was worried about Mark and Taeyong. They couldn’t lose another member. They were already down to 8, and losing either the leader or their second youngest would really blow their motivation and steam.

Their tour started strong and got a great reaction from fans, thanks to starting on Yuta’s home turf. They decided to celebrate the night of their final opening leg. Doyong noticed how little Mark ate or drank during the get together.  
“Mark?” Doyoung spoke just before Mark entered his hotel room. He didn’t answer. Just looked up. He entered his room but left the door open, so Doyoung followed.  “Are you okay?” he shut the door and leant against it.  
“Not really...” he went over to the fridge, opened it and took out the bottles of spirits.  
“If you wanted to drink, you should’ve drank at the restaurant. It’s cheaper than what this stuff is.”  
Mark looked up but didn’t reply. He kept eye contact as he twisted the cap open and took a swig. He offered it to Doyoung. He shook his head.  
“You either join me or you leave,” Mark sat down on the bed. Doyoung joined him and took the drink. Mark uncapped another one and drank from that. Doyoung wasn’t sure how long they sat in silence but Doyoung waited til Mark had finished his first bottle to speak, “so what’s going on?”   
“I’m just… overwhelmed.” A cap cracked. He'd opened another.  
“With everything?”    
“Drink.” Mark's voice was flat. The elder did as he was told.  “Yeah everything. Jungwoo’s out. SuperM and 127 at the same time come November...what if… what if I break too? Then what? I won’t just be letting down you guys but SuperM too…” he took a large gulp. It looked like whiskey. Doyoung pulled a face just imagining the flavour.   
“That won’t happen.’”   
“You never know… Donghyuck’s injury last year was sudden.”   
“But that won’t happen.”   
“How do you-”   
“I don’t,” he held Mark’s stare as they looked at each other, “it won’t happen, okay?”   
“.... Drink.” Mark stood up and played some music on his phone. He walked around the room, turning the big light off and turning the bedside light on. Doyoung finished his drink with a sour face. Straight vodka wasn’t his favourite. He watched Mark who stood with his back to him. Mark slowly undid his shirt and took it off, hanging it over the hotel chair. Mark turned around and leant against the table.  
“You look good...” he spoke softly.   
Doyoung laughed a little, “thank you?”   
Mark walked over and sat next to him. He offered his drink to Doyoung. He took it without question and took a big gulp. Mark laughed as Doyoung tried to swallow the liquid. “You always look good…” Mark whispered as he tucked some hair behind the older's ear. He leant in and kissed his lips. Doyoung immediately responded back. Mark hooked a finger under his chin. Doyoung placed his hands lightly on his thighs. A moan escaped him as Mark moved to grasp his neck. Mark felt Doyoung’s hands smooth up his thighs, massaging softly, towards his hips. The younger moved a hand to his shoulder, while the elder moved to his hips, touching the exposed skin. Doyoung felt Mark’s hand grip tighter at his shoulder. Then he felt a stabbing jolt in his back. He winced in pain as Mark pulled him up and pushed him against the nearest wall. Mark had both hands securely against his shoulders. He was also looking down.  
“Mark what are you-”  
“I’m already so tired.” He heard his own voice break, “we’ve been working so hard and it feels like it’s been nonstop...I…” Doyoung heard sniffles. “I’m so scared of another bad thing happening. What if… I get injured or… Taeyong hurts his neck again but fakes being okay… what if another member gets hurt. What if...” he looked up at Doyoung. The tears were already down his face and dropping off. “What if you get hurt? What if your chest pains start again?”  
“Mark. We’re okay. We’ll be okay.”  
“You don’t know that!” Mark placed his head on Doyoung’s chest and dropped his arms down.   
“Mark… Mark...” He cupped Mark’s face and brought his eyes up to  level with his, “Mark listen to me. We are fine. Everyone is fine. You are fine. Taeyong is fine. Jungwoo is already doing much better. I am fine. Everyone is fine.”   
“But-”   
“No buts. We are all fine. A few months ago, no. But we got rest, we went to the hospital, we got time off. We are fine.” A few more tears escaped Mark but at least he was calming down and looking at Doyoung.  
“You promise?”   
“Yes… I promise.”   
Mark opened his mouth to speak but-  
“We are all,” he pecked his lips quickly, “fine.” he gave a deep, long kiss. Mark looked at him. Eyes half closed by either exhaustion, drunkenness, or both, but he still looked beautiful in Doyoung’s eyes.  
“Dongyoung…” he whispered. Doyoung’s eyes went wide. He couldn’t take in Mark’s next kiss out of shock. ‘Dongyoung,” Mark kissed harder this time. And again. “Dongyoung,” words turning to moans with every kiss that came after it. Doyoung moved Mark back to the bed as they kissed. Soon enough, Mark was flat on his back on the bed with Doyoung straddled on top. Their fingers were intertwined and above Mark’s head. Doyoung looked down at Mark. He had really fallen for this boy. Was it still just fun for Mark? Doyoung felt Mark tighten against his fingers.  
“Dongyoung?”  
Doyoung smiled and came back down for a kiss, “it’s okay,” another, “we’re all okay,” and another, “you’re okay Minhyung”.

*

“Hyuungg!!!!” Mark yelled down the phone. Doyoung moved his ear away from the receiver. He checked the clock. It must’ve been late at night wherever Mark was in America right now.  
“What’s wrong?”  
“Nottthhiinnng”   
“Are you drunk?”  
“Maaayyybbeee,” Mark heard Doyoung snicker, “I just...I just wanted to hear your voice hyung.”  
“Markie you saw me less than 48 hours ago, and you’ll be fly back in 2 days.”  
“...I still miss you though.”   
“Markie, you can’t miss me that badly.”   
“But I do!!!!”   
He heard the pout through the phone, “more so than the other members?”   
“Yes!”   
“They won’t be happy when I tell them that.”   
“”I don’t cware.” The drunk aegyo was out.  
“Well I cware,” he cringed at his own attempt.  
“About me?! You mean about me right?!”  
“ _ Haha _ of course I care about you.”   
“Yay!”  
“...So what’s the real reason why you called?”  
“Because I miss you.”  
“Come on Markie, you only call me like this when you’re wasted.”   
“I really do miss you. Even if we’re apart for only a few days.”   
Doyoung felt his breath get caught, “...do you mean it?”   
“Yes!”   
“Then why can’t you be this way with me sober?”   
“...”   
“Mark?” Doyoung sighed “I know I’ve asked you before but, why can’t you?”   
“I just can’t.”   
“But-”   
“Don’t you prefer me this way? How honest I am like this? I’m always honest with you like this.”   
“But-”   
“Is it not enough?”  
“...what happened to this just being for fun?”   
Mark didn’t reply. For a long time he didn’t reply.  “You know I love you hyung, right?”  
“....I do.”   
“You know how much I love you hyung, right?”  
“I…”   
“You know right?!”   
“...No Mark, I don’t.”   
Mark didn’t respond.  
“I can’t take your drunk antics as truth. I want…I want more,” Doyoung’s heart was almost out of his chest with how hard it was beating.  
“...okay hyung… I understand… I’m sorry.”   
“Mark I-”  
The line cut off. Doyoung was left to stare at his bedroom wall with a dead dial tone in his ear.

*

Doyoung should’ve taken the company’s restrictions as a god send. The country wasn’t on lockdown yet, but all artists were being told to stay in their homes as much as possible, only going out for schedules and the rare time managers would say okay for them to go shopping. Thus led to Doyoung’s current predicament. It had definitely crept up on him. First it was members having movie nights to pass the amount of new time they had as their schedules were being cancelled and rearranged. Mark made sure he sat next to Doyoung, and that was fine. Totally normal. But then Mark would watch the movies with his head glued to Doyoung’s shoulder. And then another day, he actually started bringing a blanket big enough for them to share and kept his hand on Doyoung’s thigh the entire movie. Doyoung didn’t push him away though. It was harmless. Most members did this stuff normally anyway. Of course it was unusual for Mark to be so open, even in front of members.  _ And sober, _ he added.  Then when Punch rehearsals started, Mark started coming at night. To his room.

“Mark? What are you-” Doyoung was at his door.   
“I’m tired,” he was looking down at his feet.   
“Go to sleep then.”   
“Can I sleep here?”  
“...are you serious?”   
Mark looked up then, “yes,” in a quiet voice. He was biting his lip.  _ Cute. _ Doyoung opened his door wider so Mark could step in.  
“You sleeping against the wall again?” remembering that first night.  Mark nodded.  “Okay.” Doyoung moved past Mark to sit in his bed. He looked over at Mark, “are you not gunna join me?”  Mark just starred.  Doyoung leaned over to grab Mark’s hand and bring him towards the bed. Mark followed and climbed onto it. Doyoung looked at him. Mark looked down at his lap.  “Mark?”   
He shook his head, “nothing...” he finally looked at Doyoung, “goodnight hyung,” he slid down into the covers and turned to face the wall. Doyougn switched his light off and shuffled under too. He was on his back but his head was turned towards Mark. He looked so small. All curled up. Just as Doyoung closed his eyes, he felt something moving next to him. He felt fingers touch his own. They held his fingertips so lightly, so delicately. The younger tugged a little, so Doyoung allowed his hand be tugged towards Mark’s back and hip. Doyoung wrapped his hand around his waist slightly and brushed his thumb against the skin that was poking out under Mark’s pajama shirt. He felt Mark relax to the touch. After a few minutes of stroking his waist. Doyoung decided to turn over and moved closer to Mark. He left a little bit of room between Mark and himself, just in case, but hooked his arm fully over Mark’s waist. Mark instantly moved to close the gap and flushed against Doyoung’s chest. Mark placed his hand lightly over Doyoung’s and went to sleep. He doesn’t know when he fell asleep. All Doyoung remembered was his brain and heart going on overdrive, and then it was the next morning. 

For the first time, Mark was still there when he woke up.

It became a daily habit. After every day of rehearsals, Mark would sleep in Doyoung’s bed. After a few days, Doyoung at least tried to ask Mark about his day, if he had any worries, how he felt preparations were going. Mark would reply, but in very few words. Was it tiredness or Mark being shy? Doyoung couldn’t tell. After the first week, Mark would stop knocking before coming in. He would simply come in, get in bed with Doyoung, and they’d go to sleep. A few days after that, Mark shyly kissed Doyoung quickly on the cheek before facing the wall to sleep. A few more days after that, Doyoung grabbed Mark’s arm to stop him from turning away. He kissed Mark on the lips. Mark quickly responded back. But it wasn’t their usual hot, heavy, about to lead to sex kiss. It was soft, slow, took it’s time. Mark wrapped Doyoung’s arm around his stomach as he turned around to sleep.

They had a week left until Punch promos started. Doyoung knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t help it.   
“Mark…” Doyoung was still sat up in bed when Mark came in.   
“Yeah?”   
“This is the last night,” he looked up at him.  
Mark stopped at the foot of the bed, “What do you mean?”   
“Are we still only doing this for fun? Are we still only doing this because we’re lonely? Until someone actually comes along?”   
Mark stayed quiet.  
“Promotions start next week. Please no longer come here after tonight,”   
“But-”   
“I’m tired of playing games. I’m…” he was going to say it, “I don’t see this as a game. I actually want something between us.” Mark opened his mouth but Doyoung spoke first, “you don’t come here after tonight. I want you to seriously think about this. I’m tired. You have until the end of Punch promos. Please decide Mark and at the end of promos tell me what you really want. Whatever that is. But you don’t come here during promos, you understand?”   
Mark simply nodded. There was a sadness in his eyes. They glistened a little. Was he going to cry?  
“But I can still stay tonight?” his voice was small. Almost like it was going to crack. Crack like glass.  
Doyoung wore a small smile, “just for tonight.” Mark got in and moved to his corner. Once the lights were off, Doyoung cuddled up to his back.   
“Goodnight Markie…”   
Mark turned around to face him. Doyoung opened his eyes. It felt like they were staring at each other in the dark. Mark gently put his arm around Doyoung's waist and squeezed lightly. He came into Doyoung’s space and placed a soft, long kiss on his lips. His grip on Doyoung’s waist tightened as he shuffled even closer and under Doyoung’s chin.    
“Goodnight hyung.”

Doyoung was in shock. Mark had never slept facing him before.

*****

**June 7th 2020 - The day Punch Promos Ended**

_ Knock Knock.  
_ Doyoung opened the door.  
“Hyung?”   
“Yes?”

**Author's Note:**

> What do you think happened at the end?!
> 
> (Story and Title Inspired by: Wasted by Jesse McCartney)


End file.
